Monday, April 16, 2007

The biggest enemy?

Some people will say that their biggest enemy is the devil. Some will said that is their boss, their wife, their competitor or someone that hurt them the most. As for me, I think that my biggest enemy is myself.

Why would I say that? It’s because I found out that the biggest enemy is in me. It’s myself. Many times in life, I’ve been battling with myself. Should I or should I not? Can or cannot? Good and bad, it’s up to how we analysis it, how we want it to be and how we define the word. I always believe that, if you want something to happen, it will always happen. If you don’t willing to make it happen, no matter how hard you try with unwilling heart, it will not happen as well. After all, it’s back to the topic willingness.

Like what my best friend told me, everything come from the heart and everything matter the most is in the heart. A person with good intention, no matter what he/she did, he will sow a good seed, and will reap a good fruit. If he/she have bad and evil motive, he/she will sow a bad seed and reap an evil fruit. Everything that we do, there is consequences that we have to bear. Sometimes, the rebellious inside of me will try to come out and try to control the conscious me, but with God’s grace, I am still won this battle.

In my life, I might not understand why are all these happen to me? I’ve been good, I do everything with good intention and yet things went the other way from what I’ve planned. I don’t understand but many people around me will said that one fine day, you will know it. I can only long to see that day and learn the lesson that I should learn.

Everything happened for a purpose, for a reason. Many people come and go in my life. No matter how long they stay in my heart, how seasonal it is, how fast they forgot me, I truly appreciate the time of being together with them. When the time or season has past, we might not remember how sweet it is when we are together. I truly love people around me. No matter it’s a season thing, permanent or temporarily. If I could make it forever, I will try my best to make it forever. But if I’ve tried my best and yet I couldn’t make it forever, I will let it go with a grateful heart for the time that we’ve spent together when you are with me.

Every struggle, there is a lesson. Every trials, there is a victory. Lord…not what I want, but what You want. My biggest enemy… myself, my mind. May you continue to guide me and tame me as soft as a rabbit but as strong as a lion.


**Jennieliau, my biggest enemy**

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